As I type, the house is completely silent. I can hear the gentle hum of the fridge, and the bouncing of the clothes in the dryer, and a few squeaks from a sleeping baby. I brewed some chai tea and am enjoying the quiet.
Today marks my third day home alone with both of my boys. My grandparents had been staying with us but made there way back home on Monday morning. Monday went okay. My only goal was to survive until 5 oclock. I managed to get the boys and myself dressed and fed. We watched way too much tv but I'm at peace with that right now. By Monday evening I noticed some stiffness in my breast. And if you know my history with my first child and mastitis, this is very scary. I went to the clinic and they were closed so I thought I would nurse Paxton and then go to emergency to get some antibiotics. While nursing him, the pain went from a one to a one million. My whole breast got tomato red and my nipple turned purple and bruised (yeah I little TMI). I stopped nursing and it took me three minutes to be apple to but my bra back on. I would rather go through labour then feel that pain again. So now I'm on antibiotics and trying my best to stay positive about breastfeeding. Its very tempting to stop to prevent any risk of infection but Paxton is only two weeks old and I feel terrible about stopping so early. The pain is more or less gone and I've started pumping on the left again. I'm waiting until the nipple heals before attempting nursing again.
So I'm enjoying the silence and the fact that I'm in no pain right now. I feel normal. Like a human. Not a milk machine or a bum who doesn't take a shower:)
Slowly but surely I'm healing and adjusting to life as a mother of two. I even did two loads of laundry today! Oh the things mothers become proud of:)
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